WHY IT IS MEDICALLY NECESSARY FOR MRS. LO TO BE IN A ROWBOAT

MRS. LO'S SATURDAY MORNING BLOG. "WHY IT IS MEDICALLY NECESSARY FOR MRS. LO TO SIT IN A ROWBOAT ALL DAY" - when I went on the Family Cruise 3 weeks ago, my first cruise, I adjusted incredibly well to being at sea. That should have been my first clue. I could literally do cartwheels down the hall on rocky seas when other passengers had trouble walking. However, upon disembarking, my knees buckled and I could not get used to the sensation of being on land. The world was moving like a cruise ship but I wasn't on a cruise ship. I saw my primary doctor and he gave me medicine for vertigo, which was helpful. Then I saw my ENT and he diagnosed me with "MDDS," or Mal de Disembarquement Syndrome. This rare and temporary condition occurs when your brain adjusts so well to the pitching and tilting of a cruise ship that the brain is unable to "re-set" to being on land. Hence, the incredibly uncomfortable feelings of vertigo all the time. "Great, Dr. Munzer, I'm so glad you diagnosed me, now how do we fix this?" I said, cheerfully. "Oh, there's no cure for it," he said equally cheerfully. (I'm sorry, is it the ringing in my ears, did he say no cure?). He explained that this would go away on its own, in time, and the first thing I should do is stop the vertigo medicine, which just masks the symptoms and does nothing to improve the condition. I asked him how I was supposed to get through the day. "Just power through," he said. Crew parents will recognize this to be a term used in crew, maybe in other sports, to mean just suck up the pain and keep going. "Is there anything at all that makes you feel better?" he asked me. Well, whenever I go in the motorboat with Big Coach or sit in any of the crew shells or kayaks, yes, I feel great. "Then do that," he said. So, yesterday, with the world pitching and rolling in my office, I left, went down to summer camp and went in the motor boat with Big Coach. Normally, that's a harrowing ride but for me it was heavenly. And I spent the rest of the afternoon and evening watching the kids at practice, while lying in a rowboat. Just what the doctor ordered. Of course, I had to explain to Big Coach what I wanted to do. "You want to sit in the motorboat?" he asked, "and you don't want it to go anywhere?" Exactly, I said. "Are you tricking me into something?" he inquired with a raised eyebrow

. "No, coach, it's doctor's orders." He was confused by my request, but way too busy to ask any further and basically said help yourself, Mrs. Lo, as long as I don't have to drive you anywhere during practice. I promise to be especially thankful for my balance when it comes back to me. It's funny the things we take for granted until their gone. Remember to count your blessings, everyone, and have a great day! Mrs. Lo

How Mrs. Lo Went on a Cruise and Lost Weight

Mrs. Lo had never been on a cruise before.  Everyone said get ready to gain weight, so I got ready.   I brought stretchy clothes and extra roomy T-shirts.  In fact, I lost 8 pounds in 5 days.  Now, I usually don't weigh myself.  But it so happened that I went to the doctor right before my cruise and right after.  The best advice I have for other cruisers who want to lose weight or at least stay the same weight:  just do what your kids do, assuming you have very active children.  Christian, my 13 yo, wanted to go to the gym every day, but he needed to have a parent with him, so I ended up working out at the gym every day.  Also, I was with the Little Kids a lot and they don't walk so much as do that combo walk-run that kids do when they're excited all the time.  Let's play mini-golf, run!  Let's go to the arcade on the 12th floor, run!  I also swam and snorkeled with the kids, and took every dance class that was offered:  ballroom, salsa, and cha cha.  Both of my kids, Christian in particular, had no patience for the overcrowded elevators.  So we took the stairs, 10 floors up and 10 floors down, over and over.  At first, I objected because I was wearing heels.  "You told me when you lived in New York, you walked all over Manhattan in 4-inch heels," quipped my 13 yo.  Why, oh why, does my son remember everything I say, it's like walking around with a stenographer.  I should note that I ate just what I ate at home, nothing more, nothing less.    Thus, now that I am home, I think we know what all this means:  pass the pasta, Anthony, Momma needs to get back in shape!  Remember to count your blessings and have a great week, everyone <3 Mrs. Lo

The LoBiondo Family Cruise of a Lifetime: complete with wailing infant in the next room

The entire LoBiondo Family, who make up "LoBiondoFork", just returned from the cruise of a lifetime, Nana and Pop pop, Anthony's parents, took all 11 of us on a cruise to Bermuda to celebrate their 50th Anniversary.  It was their treat, although Anthony and I decided to upgrade to a bigger room with a balcony as our own treat.  It was wonderful to have all the family and cousins together and the kids couldn't have been happier.  The Little Kids swam, snorkeled, played miniature golf, hit the arcade and generally enjoyed life to the fullest as only two little kids can.  The 3 teenagers, including Christian, enjoyed the sports, from the gym to the basketball, dodgeball, and table tennis.  Christian won a rock climbing contest, beating out college-aged kids and apparently setting a ship record.  Mrs. Lo was having a pretty good time too, until the first time I woke up in the middle of the night to the sound of a wailing baby.  I was really confused.  We were surrounded by our own family, the youngest of which is Little Michael, age 9.  And our neighbors next door were way too old to have babies.  Then John, our stateroom attendant, explained to me what was going on.  "That's not their baby, Miss, that's their grandbabies (did he use the plural?).  Your neighbors, they have their kids on board and their kids have babies.  The kids like to go to all the activities.  When I was coming in this morning at 4 am, I see the kids, they're at the Disco Dance Party."  The first thing I did was count my blessings, because the "grandparents" looked to be about my age.  Better them than me, is the first thing I thought.  So our room is next door to the Grandparent Dropoff, last stop before the young parents hit the party scene.  No wonder those poor babies are crying.  So I did what any good lawyer would do, I made myself look discheveld, which wasn't hard, and called for the manager.  I explained that I couldn't go down to see him, they would have to send him up to see me, because I hadn't slept in 3 nights due to the Grandparents Dropoff situation.  Gerard, the manager, couldn't have been nicer.  "No problem, Miss," he said, "I can get you something to help you sleep all night."  You mean, special pillows, I said.  "No, Miss, something from the ship doctor."  Did he just offer me drugs?  I managed to stay drug-free all these years, I don't want to end up in Betty Ford because of my cruise.  Actually, Gerard, I was hoping for another room, where there is no baby next door.  "Oh, sorry, Miss the ship is booked full up."  Well, maybe the Captain can sleep in the Library and I can have his room, I joked.  "Hmmm, a room just for sleeping, let me see what I can do."  Thankfully, Gerard came through, and we ended with a second room, where I could go just to sleep at night.  It was on the same deck where the crew sleeps.  It wasn't the Captain's room, but after 3 sleepless nights at sea, I didn't care, I was just happy to get a good night's rest.  And it was one more room for the Little Kids to play in and the teenagers to shower in, the ship was starting to look like LoBiondoFork.  I promised several readers that I would explain what "LoBiondoFork" is.  For those of you under 40, there used to be a show in the 80's called "Dallas."  The extended Ewing family of Texas all lived together in a sprawling mansion-ranch they called "Southfork."  The LoBiondo Family all lives within walking distance of each other in Newburgh, and we joke that our houses put together are "LoBiondoFork."  All in all, it truly was the cruise and vacation of a lifetime, with beautiful memories and of course, lots of pictures.  Remember to count your blessings, everyone, and have a great day! <3 Mrs. Lo

When is Mom Too Old for a Bikini?

WHEN IS MOM YOU "TOO OLD" TO WEAR A BIKINI - short answer: when the time comes, my kids, who are merciless with their honesty, will be the first to let me know. Today, three generations of the LoBiondo Family will embark on a cruise to Bermuda to celebrate the 50th wedding anniversary of Nana and Pop pop, Anthony's parents. We feel very blessed to have our whole family together and this whole trip was my in-laws' treat. While packing, I had the Style Channel on. Some British woman appeared on screen and pronounced that at 47, one is officially too old for a bikini. (I will be 48 later this month). Uh-oh, I said. I looked at my swimsuit collection. All two-pieces. Except for the Speedo suits I use to swim laps at the Y, and they're not really cruise worthy. It never occurred to me that it might be time to go out and get "mommy suits" with skirts. In fact, although my mom had a killer figure back in the day, she always wore a mommy suit with a skirt. And a bathing cap with little flowers on it, if she was going to swim. I didn't bother to ask my husband his opinion, he's so supportive, that he's almost blinded by love. Like when I came home from the hospital after giving birth to Christian. My husband truly thought I looked great, and had me believing I had lost almost all the baby weight. Then my brother stopped by the house. He gave me a pat on the belly and said, "Hey, Sis, I didn't know you were having twins ... looks like they left one in there!" It's funny now, but it was a tear fest back then. And both my sons have taken on the mantel of my little brother when it comes to honesty. I have cowboy boots I've never worn out of the house. I almost did, one time. My boys stopped me at the door. "Oh no, mom, please, don't wear those out of the house. Ever. We thought that was for one of your costume parties." So I asked my kids, do you think it's time to for your mom to start wearing mommy suits? "What's a mommy suit?" You know, the one piece, with the skirt on it. "Like grandma wears?" Exactly. "No, mom, how could you embarass us like that, please don't get a mommy suit," said Christian, my 13 yo, and I might have seen an eye roll too. "If you don't want people to see you," offered Little Michael, my 9 yo helpfully, "you could just stay in the room all day." Thanks, kids, I guess. I do appreciate the brutal honesty, I could always count on my brother for that, and now I can count on my sons. I guess I won't

make any drastic wardrobe changes for now. Remember to count your blessings, everyone! We are feeling very, very blessed at this moment, as we embark on this trip. Thank you for reading Mrs. Lo's Saturday Morning Blog, have a great day, everyone!  Mrs. Lo

The DOMA victory and the connection between U.S. v. Windsor and U.S. v. Loving

HERE IS WHAT MRS. LO WROTE ON JUNE 12, 2013:  "we are all on 'Windsor Watch,' awaiting the decision of the U.S. Supreme Court in U.S. v. Windsor, as well as the Proposition 8 case.  Regardless of whether the Windsor case

is decided on the grounds of States' rights, federalism, or whatever else is in the Court's toolbox, the Defense of Marriage Act needs to be overturned.  While Mrs. Lo is staunchly pro-same sex marriage, the reason the Windsor case needs to be affirmed is because the federal government simply has no jurisdiction over Family Law and the DOMA act should never have been enacted.

Today, June 12, is the 46th year anniversary of the U.S. Supreme Court's decision in Loving v. Virginia, 388 U.S. 1 (1967).  Mildred and Richard Loving, then a young married couple, were arrested in 1958 for violating the anti-miscegenation laws, which existed in 16 states at the time, including Virgina, and prohibited marriage between whites and non-whites.  The Lovings, were convicted (they had a child by this time), and their motion to vacate was denied.  The Circuit Court affirmed in part, reversed and remanded and the conviction went up on appeal to the Warren Court. 

In one of Mrs. Lo's favorite written decisions ever, the U.S. Supreme Court declared Virginia's anti-miscegenation statute, known as the 'Racial Integrity Act of 1924' as violative of the equal-protection clause and therefore unconstitutional.  This rendered the remaining 15 state anti-miscegenation statutes unconstitutional and gave all couples the freedom to marry -- unless those couples were of the same sex."This brings us to present day, and I have written extensively on the US v. Windsor case, as Edith Windsor is a New Yorker and a personal hero of mine.  Due to the DOMA, although validly married in Canada, and although her marriage to her deceased spouse is recognized now under New York State Law, she still had to pay over $360,000.00 in estate taxes because her marriage was not recognized under Federal Law."

With the decision yesterday, the U.S. Supreme Court, in a 5-4 vote struck down the Defense of Marriage Act as unconstitutional, violative of the Fifth Amendment.  In addition, by refusing to hear the Proposition 8 appeal, the U.S. Supreme Court effectively cleared the way for California to become the 13th State in the Union to recognize same sex marriage.

The connection to U.S. v. Loving is obvious.  While same sex-marriage is not illegal, the way that "miscegenation" (marriage between a white a non-white) was at the time of the Loving case, the final battleground will be set when a legally married same sex couple relocates to a State which does not recognize same sex marriage.  In the Loving case, this resulted in the arrests of the couple in the State of Virgina.

Let us explore this hypothetical:  a same sex couple legally married in, let's say, New York State, will move to a state which does not recognize same sex marriage.  The couple may seek to assert federal benefits, such as the benefits of the federal Estate tax laws, sought by Edith Windsor, and be denied.  The couple may seek state benefits, such as the right to visit their loved one in the hospital as a "spouse" and be denied.  Yet this couple was legally married in the State of New York.  If this couple then becomes a plaintiff in any myriad of possible constitutional cases to come before the U.S. Supreme Court, that will be the connection between U.S. v. Windsor and U.S. v Loving.  A same sex couple that is properly and happily married in one state, will move to another state, be denied constitutional, federal, and State rights, and bring on an action.

This will finally force the issue to be MORE than one of States' rights or federalism.  Once and for all, the U.S. Supreme Court will have to determine that broad issue of same sex marriage and the benefits that flow therefrom, at every level, to be an inalienable right.  Anything less than the unfettered right of same sex couples to marry in every state of the Union is nothing less than unconstitutional.

Adding to the list of my heroes will be:  Mildred and Richard Loving, Edith Windsor and Thea Spyer, Roberta Kaplan, and the future couple who will be bringing on this constitutional challenge.  

Juliana LoBiondo
www.LoBiondoLaw.com
Juliana@lobiondolaw.com

Mrs. Lo's Roundup of Local Summer Camps

School is out and for working parents, this can be a dilemma.  Unless you're in that "sweet spot" in life where you have a a teenager at home who you can force into indentured servitude, I mean, convince to watch your younger kids, you're probably going to need a summer camp that serves as child care, hopefully enriches your kids at least somewhat, and also won't break the bank.  Here's Mrs. Lo's roundup of local camps:

1.  Newburgh Rowing Summer Camp.  Of course, as Team Mom, you knew this would be my number one pick. Nestled on 2 docks on the Hudson River at Ward Brothers Memorial Park in the City of Newburgh, this is a hidden gem.  Kayaking and canoeing, rowing in crew shells for advanced rowers, team games, fitness, movies on rainy days, crafts, ecology science training, and more.  Run by certified coaches and certified public school teachers, with Varsity rowers as Camp counselors, this is also a bargain, at only $160.00 per week, from 9 am - 3 pm, with extenion hours available.  But hurry, the first week is almost full, although there is space in weeks 2, 3, and 4 right now.  Sign up at the Town of Newburgh Rec Center or download their brochure at:  http://www.townofnewburgh.org/FCpdf/2013%20Brochure%20no%20Ads.pdf

2.  Summer FUNdamentals at Bishop Dunn Memorial School.  Highly recommended, my kids attend BDMS so I'm familiar with the program.  The highlights are swimming at the Mount Saint Mary's College Pool, the Drama Program and all the sports, academic and enrichment activities you can choose from.  This is where my oldest learned to play chess and he remains a wicked chess player to this day. Check out the website at:  http://www.bdms.org/sumfun/

3.  Hudson Highland Nature Museum Camps.  I highly recommend these camps, they are fabulous but sell out quickly.  If you need coverage from 9 am - 5 pm, this will leave you a little short but if you can find a way to swing it, give it a try.  Christian did the Trekkers Camp, back when it was only 9 am - 12 pm and he loved every minute of it.  It's really a great outdoors experience for all the kids:  http://hhnaturemuseum.org/index.php/summer-camp

4.  Mount Saint Mary's College Sports Camps.  The Mount offers great sports camps, from Basketball to Baseball.  The highlight is the Swim Camp, taught by the Coach of the Award winnin Girls Swim Team (or at least it used to be).  Check out the website at:  http://msmcknights.com/sports/2009/2/19/GEN_0219091013.aspx?tab=sportsc

5.  Washingtonville Soccer Camp.  July 22 - July 26, 2013.  Run by the wonderful granddaddy of all soccer coaches, the Champion-maker, Mr. Martelli, this camp is only one week but if your kids love soccer, at the local level, this is the one soccer camp you don't want to miss.  http://wscsoccerclub.com/index.html

6.  Vassar College also offers great sports camps.  Check them out at:  http://www.vassarathletics.com/sports/2012/3/6/GEN_0306121056.aspx?id=280

7.  Marist College has a wide array of sports camps for kids:  http://www.goredfoxes.com/ViewArticle.dbml?DB_OEM_ID=27700&ATCLID=205275262

8.  Just Off Broadway Theatrical Training.  For your budding theatre actor, the fabulous JOB, Inc. offers a wonderful program: http://www.justoffbwy.com/Theatrical_Academy.html

9.  Camp Robbins YMCA.  The oldest and still the leader of traditional summer camps in Newburgh.  Chances are if you grew up in Newburgh, you learned to swim at this camp.  Full days and lots of supervision and outdoor fun.  Check them out at: http://www.newburghymca.org/webpages/CAMP_ROBBINS.aspx

10.  Splash and Dash at the Union Avenue Y.  An affordable option for working parents, there is a heavy emphasis on swimming in the huge regulation size indoor pool.  They have the best swim lessons and the best lifeguards around and take pool safety seriously.  They also have field trips, from Lakes and hiking to Splashdown, and just started a Scholastic book fair.  http://communityfitnesscenter.com/Camp/2013Splash_N_Dash_New_Windsor_Registration_2013.pdf

The 13th birthday milestone: in other cultures, he'd be alone in the woods with a Spear right now

THE LoBIONDO FAMILY PASSES A MILESTONE - yesterday, we threw the mother of all backyard parties for Christian's 13th birthday.  The planning and execution was more exhausting than any Crew Meet or Gala I've ever been involved with, but so much more rewarding.  It was sort of open house style, with people coming in waves.  I believe the last wave showed up at 10 pm, there were kids who left the party, went to their 8th grade formal, and came back at 10:00 pm.  We had a total of maybe 50 kids all together.  We had the fabulous DJ Emma and Ryan but instead of dancing, the music was a backdrop for fierce games of football, soccer, frisbee, and a King of the Hill type game that was a combination of basketball, soccer and dodgeball.  We went through 600 water balloons and lost all the drinking water in our tank for a while. We measured the amount of hamburgers, hotdogs, sausage and peppers, and barbecued chicken by the dozens.  Mrs. Lo cooked for days and Anthony didn't stop the grill til 10:00 pm.  We had a  certified coach and phys ed teacher, Coach Cunningham, running the games.  Nick Bourne, former NFA Varsity Football and Crew and now a YWCA camp counselor over the summer was on hand to pump everybody up as only he can, and teach everyone the basics of football.  We have a lot of soccer players, so we really started basic, but even the girls learned how to play and were amazed at how good they were.  The kids hiked our stream up to the "waterfall" and almost to the Hudson River.  We brought together kids from all walks of life, from the City of Newburgh to the onion fields of Orange County and everybody bonded and yakked it up all night.  The parents showed me the texts their kids were sending them:  "PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE don't pick me up I'm having so much fun!"  Then around 9 pm, the kids decided they wanted to set up the slip and slide.  Sure, why not.    
     After all, our son is turning 13, utter exhaustion is a small price to pay for this much home-grown fun.  If we were in other cultures, right around this time, there are entirely different ways to celebrate.  For instance, in one culture I read about, at this age, Christian would have been sent into the woods alone.  With a spear.  And would not have been expected to come back until he was carrying dinner on his spear.  This is the age of risky behavior.  So far so good.  But yes, we will continue to offer to have "the party" at our house (also known to the kids as "Club Awesome") because that's how we keep an eye on them.
     Can we all come back tomorrow, Mrs. Lo, can we, can we, can we?  Tomorrow, huh.  Sure, as long as we don't have to cook again.  And bring some garbage bags, we have a lot of water balloon debris to clean up.  Have a great day, everyone!  <3  Mrs. Lo